2012 Democratic National Convention Schedule -- Charlotte, NC (Joe Biden thinks it is in Virginia)
4:00 PM - Opening Flag Burning Ceremony - sponsored by CNN, MSNBC, NBC, CBS, ABC
4:05 PM - Singing of "God Damn America " led by Rev. Jeremiah Wright
4:10 PM - Pledge of Allegiance to Obama
4:15 PM - Ceremonial 'I hate America' led by Michelle Obama
4:30 PM - Tips on "How to keep your man trustworthy & true to you while you travel the world" - Hillary Clinton
4:45 PM - Al Sharpton / Jesse Jackson seminar "How to have a successful career in race baiting."
5:00 PM - "Great Vacations I've Taken on the Taxpayer's Dime Travel Log" - Michelle Obama
5:30 PM - Eliot Spitzer Speaks on "Family Values" via Satellite
5:45 PM - Tribute to All 57 States - Obama
6:00 PM - Sen. Harry Reid - 30-minute speech expressing the Democrat's appreciation of the Occupy Wall Street movement, and George Soros for sparing no expense, for all that they have accomplished to unify the country, improve employment and to boost the economy, with special recognition to the OWS guy who crapped on the police car.
6:30 PM - Ethics in Politics - Nancy Pelosi
6:35 PM - How to blame some one else for your own incompetence - Obama
7:00 PM - Film tribute to Kenya, Obama's home country - Michelle Obama (she said so herself)
7:30 PM - How to get your birth control paid for by the taxpayers and still remain a respectable sl*t. - Sandra Fluck
8:00 PM - How to speak with and Indian dialect when visiting a 7/11 - Joe Biden
8:15 PM - My Muslim Faith - Obama (he said so himself)
8:30 PM - Airing of Grievances by the Clintons
8:45 PM - Unusual things one can do with a cigar, and the definition of what "is" is. - Bill Clinton
9:00 PM - Tips on avoiding sniper fire. - Hillary
9:30 PM - "Bias in Media - How we can make it work for you" Tutorial - sponsored by CBS, NBC, ABC, CNN, the Washington Post and the New York Times
9:45 PM - Tribute Film to Brave Freedom Fighters incarcerated at GITMO - Michael Moore
10:00 PM - How to cheat on your taxes and still serve in government - Tim Geithner.
Friday: Two hours devoted to Muslim prayers lead by radical Muslim Clerics that want to replace out Constitution with the Quran (Obama in full support), meanwhile the DNC rejects request by Catholic Cardinal to offer blessing. Don't believe it, look it up.
Down and dirty debates (well, yeah, politics).
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